Gender

There has been a question that has been plaguing me, one that deals with my own opinions, as well as social acceptance. As a teacher, should I do what I think is right, and help teach kids to accept everyone and promote them to be themselves even if that definition does not conform to normal gender roles, or do I try to promote the views of the general community, to help children blend in and meet the regulations of society? It is a fine line, one that has more effect on the child than it does on me, which means making the right decision is even more important.

I personally believe that there is nothing wrong for living out side of a gender stereotype. Let men be as emotionally expressive, or girls as withdrawn as possible. Let them have no bias' when they make their life decision, because there is no real reason why they cannot do anything that they are capable of doing. In fact, they're excel when they are given the freedom to express themselves freely. All it takes is one experience of being told that you cannot do something because of your gender to know that those rules don't make sense, and they hurt you. Society places these restrictions, and traps developing minds within a position that may not fit them.

But...the world isn't perfect. As much as I speak for the freedom of the individuals, there is also a heavy burden that goes along with that. Their will always be people who have not expanded their realm of thinking, and to someone who is stepping out of societies comfort zones, it puts them at risk for those willing to take action against things they disagree with. It doesn't take much to look at the gay teen suicides in the past few months to realize that being yourself sometimes comes with pain. As a teacher, do I have a responsibility to try to protect kids from that fate?

I mentioned this problem to a friend of mine who is gay. I wanted to know what their opinion was, to see if they had a preference for what they would have wanted. While he said that he would have loved to have a teacher that had told him that it was okay to be himself, he also hesitated. He admitted that things would probably be easier things were kept quiet, focusing more on fitting in than coming in to himself at that young age. My answer was still unclear.

Perhaps, there will be no real answer. Social Learning, Cognitive Development Theory, and Gender Schema theory all look at different ways that the world shapes the mind of the child, and how it teaches them to behave. It doesn't always create those behaviours, it sometimes creates shame that they do not follow those behaviours. So what part of that social learning system should a teacher be? Should I follow my morals, or, do I have a responsibility to the community and to that child? What is my responsibility to that child?

If there is an answer, I doubt it's black and white. All it takes is a quick look to see that there are many viewpoints, and it takes so much to move people from their positions.